DON’T EVEN FUCKING TALK TO ME ABOUT THE LIBRARY OF ALEXANDRIA
FUCK NOW I’M UPSET
If I had a time machine and could only do one thing with it, I would take a generator and a photocopier to Alexandria and make copies of everything. So we could read all those lost plays and find out what the scientists of the time thought about the world.
tips to write college papers
- begin with “buckle your seatbelts, motherfuckers, because in eight short pages i am going to learn u a thing that i only learned myself about two hours ago, so sit down, shut up, and enjoy the experience of my 4-am-redbull-induced-self-hatred-fuelled-writing-extravaganza”
- erase when finished with the paper
So the boy and I were watching the extended Lord of the Rings and had to switch the disk. I, obviously, didn’t want to move so I asked him to change it. He was like “*sigh* as you wish” and I was like PRINCESS BRIDE?? to which he responded in the positive.
I like this boy it is a good one I think I will keep him.
i dedicate this post to everyone that has talked to me longer than an hour
What do you mean, vet’s office? YOU SAID WE WERE GOING TO THE PHILHARMONIC!
you know how in musicals the couple will start singing the same song no matter how far apart they are
what if that happened in real life
what if you were just at a restaurant one day and you started rANDOMLY SINGING because your soulmate decided to sing a duet in the shower
Omfg! What if this is why you get a song stuck in your head! Because your soulmate is singing it somewhere!
IT GOT BETTER
the best possible compliment u can give a girl is to call her a goddess like heck yeah man i will get jealous and kill mortals who are cuter than me and inadvertently cause like 3 world wars when i get bored and i will wear billowing robes of woven nebulae with eyeliner as sharp and obsidian as Krono’s sickle and burn alive the unworthy flesh of any man who dares to gaze upon my true form
Oh you’ve redecorated…
I don’t like it
i acknowledge that this house has had a renovation, but given that it’s a stupid-ass renovation, i’ve elected to ignore it.