accidentally forgetting your earbuds at home is like accidentally leaving your first born child at the gates of hell
this is your periodic reminder that old-timey medicines did not fuck around
What do you call the security guards outside Samsung shops?
Guardians of the Galaxy
I want a superhero movie where the hero dies in the first ten minutes and the woman who was supposed to be the love interest puts on his costume and becomes an even better hero.
I want all of the advertising to be for the hero and none of the marketing to even allude to this death.
imagine all the male tears
hey friend you are not too big or too small your legs are not gross and your tummy is definitely not gross. look down!!!! u are an abstract cosmic entity contained in some skin and muscle and bone!!!!! do u eVEN KNOW HOW COOL THAT IS?//?
Scarlett Johansson and Dita Von Teese - Flaunt USA October 2006
AHS: Freak Show’s official soundtrack is called “Carousel” by MELANIE MARTINEZ ! It sounds GREAT.
… I guess it was a killer joke, eh Tony? :D
If Stuntmen from the old movies don’t have your full respect then I just don’t know what to say to you
l tried really hard not to reblog this
Yeah, it is indeed really hard not to reblog a fucking thing.
Can we all agree that the man in the first gif is the manliest man in the world?
Are we just going to all silently acknowledge that the last guy is clearly dead and that we just saw him die.
HOLD UP FOR A SECOND
ALL OF THESE GIFS ARE ONE MAN
THE SINGULAR BUSTER KEATON
WHILE FILMING THE GENERAL
HE SNAPPED HIS NECK ON THE RAILROAD TIES AND WENT HOME AND ICED HIS BODY
AND CAME BACK FOR WORK THE NEXT DAY
HE ONCE GOT HIS HIP RIPPED OUT OF ITS SOCKET BY A MALFUNCTIONING ELEVATOR AND WAS DISAPPOINTED WITH HIMSELF FOR BEING INJURED
HE ONCE HAD TO FALL 100 FEET DOWN A WATERFALL INTO A NET
A STUNTMAN TESTED IT AND BROKE BOTH LEGS AND DISLOCATED HIS SHOULDER
BUSTER DID THE STUNT ANYWAY AND LANDED WITHOUT A SCRATCH
IN ‘THE HIGH DIVE’
BUSTER DID A TRICK DIVE THROUGH A CARDBOARD DECK THAT WAS CAMOUFLAGED TO LOOK LIKE THE REAL DECK
ONLY HE COULDN’T TELL FROM 100 FEET UP WHERE THE CARDBOARD STOPPED AND THE REAL DECK STARTED AND THERE WAS ONLY LIKE A THREE FOOT MARGIN FOR ERROR
AND WHEN HE HESITATED A SUDDEN BREEZE LITERALLY KNOCKED HIM OFF THE DIVING BOARD AND HE HAD TO JUMP ANYWAY
AND HE MISSED THE REAL DECK BY LESS THAN A FOOT BUT HE MADE IT
IN THE SECOND GIF HE’S RECREATING SOMETHING THAT THE ACTUAL GENERAL PURSUERS HAD TO DO IN THE CIVIL WAR
IF HE MISSES THAT TIE
THE TRAIN WILL BE DERAILED AND HE WILL DIE IN THE EXPLOSION
IN THE THIRD GIF AN ENTIRE HOUSE IS FALLING HE HAS ONE TAKE AND IF HE HAS NOT DONE THE CALCULATIONS CORRECTLY HE WILL BE CRUSHED
HE HAS AN INCH-WIDE MARGIN ON EACH SIDE
AND THE HOUSE LITERALLY BRUSHES HIS LEFT SHOULDER ON THE WAY DOWN
YOU CAN SEE HIS LEFT ARM JUMP BECAUSE HE’S FLINCHING FROM THE PAIN
THAT LAST GIF
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO MAKE THAT JUMP
HE WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO FALL AND THEY HADNT PLANNED FOR IT
BUT HE SURVIVED
BUSTER KEATON SURVIVED 100% OF THINGS THAT WOULD HAVE KILLED LESSER MEN INCLUDING WWI, TORNADOS, HOUSEFIRES, ALCOHOLISM, BROKEN NETS, CRUSHING DEPRESSION, THE DEPRESSION ITSELF, THE MCCARTHY WITCHHUNTS, THE END OF SILENT CINEMA, AND ABOUT 900 MORE OF THE STUNTS YOU SEE ABOVE
BUSTER LIVED TO BE 70 YEARS OLD
FATHERED LIKE FOUR KIDS AND EIGHT GRANDKIDS
HE CAME OUT THE OTHER SIDE OF ALL THAT
THINKING THAT LIFE WAS GOOD AND PEOPLE WERE WONDERFUL
BUSTER KEATON IS NOT JUST A STUNTMAN
HE IS A GODDAMN SAINT
BUSTER KEATON’S PARENTS WERE PART OF A TRAVELING SHOW.
THEY WERE ACROBATS.
THEY TOOK BABY BUSTER UP HIGH IN THE AIR WITH THEM.
THEY DROPPED HIM.
LUCKILY SOMEONE WHO WAS STANDING UNDER THEM CAUGHT BABY BUSTER.
THAT MAN WAS HARRY HOUDINI.
HARRY HOUDINI SAVED BUSTER KEATON’S LIFE.
if you don’t think that’s the coolest shit you can get right out.